Christmas as a foreign language teacher in China

The good thing about keeping a travel journal is that you can look back at days years ago and laugh about the things that happened.  As its fast approaching Christmas time I dug out those journals to remember 2 Christmases spent as a foreign language teacher in China.  Opening up 'the most comfortable notebook I have ever run into' I was sure first of all, the company would have appreciated the fullness of it, as the front cover also promised I would feel like writing with it all the time.  Anyone who's ever spent time in Asia may appreciate such things.

 

As real foreigners in a reasonably sized Chinese town we would be expected to take part in the schools Christmas show.  It was a great opportunity for the school to once again show its foreigners off to prospective wealthy parents.  By now I was used to this, the others weren't.  Daniel from America was particularly upset when no one seemed to appreciate his opera singing. Marlene from Australia enjoyed her moment dueting with the Head teacher until a particularly strong gust of wind blew the perfectly laid carpet right over the top of them.  Myself I showed willing by wearing traditional Chinese dress and badly singing a song that no one had ever heard of.  Am not sure how many prospective parents our efforts brought in but to be fair we weren't required to list any musical or acting skills on the teaching application form.

The audience gathers

I comforted myself in the thought that at least progress had been made from the year before.  During that Christmas the schools energetic music teacher Mr Hu, (a surprisingly large and round man for China) had decided that I would play the violin in the Christmas concert, no consideration was given to the fact I couldn't actually play, he was convinced that all would be alright on the night.  He looked confident, I had no clue.  I felt better knowing that my colleague had to play the Chinese 'Erhu' a 4 stringed instrument, she had no idea either. 

 

When the temperature hit minus 1 degrees Celsius we felt sure the concert would be off, but no, outside we trooped, tiny plastic stalls were brought out and an audience of 1500 people grew.  Tensions rose, people were expecting greatness.  They didn't get it.  Just when we started to play with music propped up in front of us on chairs there was a high gust of snow filled wind and in some kind of comic timing sheets of music went everywhere.  Laughter broke out, students ran after the music and when the rest of the small group of musicians finished a stunned silence filled to air which was awkwardly only broken when some of my lovely primary students started clapping.  

 

Thinking about it, all might have gone better if we had not already had the school staff Christmas party.  This was an interesting event held in the schools canteen.  A place where we often did our best to avoid eating as substances could not always be identified.  This night was different, the kitchen staff has pushed the boat out and dish after dish was brought to round tables and eager staff.  Chop sticks swooped in and feasting began.  Hugh piles of rice, vegetables, steamed fish and saucy meats filled the air with tempting smells and the moreish taste of MSG.  There were chicken feet, there always were, but a veteran of these occasions I had learned to quickly spin the table to the left as these approached.  The highlight of these events was always the baijiu.  For those not in the know this is an extremely strong white alcohol spirit that burns the back of your throat as it goes down.  Its polite to regularly toast the health and well being of colleagues who will pour you a small shot glass that you must down to maintain politeness and show respect.  I had learnt the hard way not to just sit there and take it, as it often proved amusing for the male teachers to see a female drinking.  I went on my own pouring mission.  When the singing started it was a sure sign that we had all had enough!

 

Suitably stuffed, but without the usual Turkey and trimming, there was just one thing left to do.  Yep sixteen classes were waiting for us to attend their individual Christmas parties complete with huge bags of sweets and strange renditions of Santa Claus is coming to town.  It was to be a long evening!